You Might Not Want To Read This (unless...)

I would like to take a moment and thank all of you for following my blog, I do this for you guys you know, it's for the fans...
Ok fuck that I do this for me, because I think it is funny and I crack the fuck up when I think about what was happening when I wrote this shit.
There is so much stuff that I don't put in here.
Like last night... I am at Outpost trying to not look like a tool and as I am getting ready to check out some little kid comes running up with a loaf of bread, now this little bastard was ugly, he had those bulging blank eyes with that long dick looking nose and recessed chin and he kept saying "who is that, who is that" to his fat piece of shit mom. The little fucker threw his bread up with my shit and as I am checking out the cashier rang it up with my groceries! Now normally I would play civil and laugh it off, but the fat bitch just looked at me through her glasses and bloated ass face and whispered to the cashier "that's not his". No fucking shit mongoloid, your dumbass kid is gonna get a beat down, the moron kept running into me and the other customers while his "mother" did nothing but smile! Maybe her orange Crocs made all of that acceptable or it could have been the coupons  (which she bitched about when they told her they were expired by two months... arggh!) in her pudgy little paw of a hand; man that kid is going to get the shit kicked out of him at school and it is his complacent madres fault. I just have no patience for these people.
I am not a parent and never will be, for those who are please remember I am drunk as shit right now (on Dexters' Lab his sister just said " oh puussy you are so warm" WOW!!) and venting my frustrations. It's not that I am a bad guy I just don't believe it to be necessary to become subserviant to a generation of snot nosed undisciplined pussies who are having others arrested for cyberbullying! Cyberbullying, not even in your face make you cry and piss your pants at recess bullying! Some childrens's psychological make up will prevent them from being able to handle "cyber bullying" I have been told, but when I was a kid Davey the Baby's dad beat the shit out of him we still made fun of him and that kid has been fuckin shit up for years in the military.
Every time I open my sexy mouth and release an unending stream of profane wisdom someone reminds me that there are children present. Fine I am offensive to some, but they are offensive to me, I don't want to look at your kid, I don't think it is cute or smart or special. I am gonna start dropping f bombs and n bombs and whatever else sorta bombs I can conjure up while I try to make gold from lead fucker.
Fine I am intoxicated, fine I can't finish the article that I am supposed to be writing, fine I am totally fucking fine (holy shit the guy on Dastardly and Muttly is the voice of Garghamel, I love the Smurfs!!!)