Morgan Freeman Was Briefly My Father

I should pobably be famous.
When it comes to vastly untapped potential this guy is the largest repository of inert awesome stuff in the world, hands down!!
The other day when I was jabber jawing with some of my peers they were like, "whoa dude you should probably take it down a notch before your head goo comes out of your listening caves" and they were right, cause it did.
People approach me all the time and say "hey aren't you that guy?" and I am, so I say "fuck off can't you see that I am in the middle of eating with my best friend Jared from Subway and he has a marathon to run against some black guys from Africa who will probably beat him because he is fat from eating all of this Subway!"

When they make the movie of my life I would like Morgan Freeman to play the part of my father and in this scene where I am a kid and we are at the baseball card shop he looks down at me and says "this guy's a collector", but then he gets hit by a bus (which makes the movie tragic and besides it's based on a true story). The bus driver decides to raise me as his own son (out of guilt for having sex with my mom, six years before he kills my dad Morgan Freeman) and he trains me in the arts of carpentry and karate, because he knows that my life is going to be tumultuos (cause I am a bastard). It will flash forward to highschool (and I want Rob Schneider to play this part) where I (Rob Schneider) have to karate fight the jocks after school before I head to my construction job and one day they corner me outside of Subway (I like Jared) and are beating me up and this guy comes out of nowhere and takes them all out! He reaches down and helps me up and says "Are you ok... little brother!?"
This is when my long lost older brother (Mickey Rourke) returned from juvy to get a fresh start and the whole town thinks he is no good so we have to karate fight all the jocks and they almost beat us but dad shows up with the bus and crashes through the gymnasium to save us. Unfortunately he is crushed by the falling backboard (which is why I hate basketball) and his last words to me are "Sheamus, I am your....." (I think Devito should play my bus driver dad)
Greatest movie idea ever and totally original.
I have had a relatively amazing life so the movie should be made into a trilogy a prequel and a postquel, but should be left open ended for my time traveling adventures.
Sometimes when I get side tracked like this it would be best to ignore what is happening and go back to social networking so as to no longer be effected by my word juice... which tastes surprisingly like cran-apple.
Seriously though, no fuckin around I should be famous... and rich, definitely famous and rich.