If comic books have taught us anything (which they have), its that exposure to nuclear radiation will turn you into a superhero. Could this be so bad? Sure Japan will soon be crawling with dudes who's limbs can stretch like silly putty and women stronger than dung beetles (currently women are exceedingly weak, this will create a legion of "super women" who can actually carry groceries, open car doors and buy their own drinks), but we as Americans have nothing to fear from these new Japanese "Super-Amigos." There is absolutely no way they could have any animosity towards the good ole US of A. Where would this race of nuclear humanoids be without our assistance and guidance (helping since back in 45, you are most welcome sir)? Sure it will be a tad bit unnerving the first time some diminutive, tourist from the land of the rising sun stretches upward for a "picture picture" of the Empire State Building; and yes the first time a woman is seen carrying her own luggage up the stairs of her first floor apartment the nearest gentleman may drop dead from a massive heart attack/brain aneurysm combo, but who is going to complain about women finally contributing to society? Soon these "ultra-dames" will be solving math problems at a 5th grade level and men will be balancing the checkbook in the kitchen while taking care of business in the lavatory.
This nuclear age is finally coming to fruition and it is about time we started to use radiation for more than curing cancer. I for one am looking forward to having doors opened for me and my new super lady picking up the check.
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